Inner fulfillment

By Rachella - July 27, 2017

Happiness is a state of inner fulfillment and it is important to distinguish factors that positively contribute to this fulfillment from factors that do not. But before I go into detail, let's discuss about the meaning of inner fulfillment. To me, inner fulfillment means the realization of your deepest desires and capacities. Note should be made that I believe true fulfillment is only achieved if this realization is through your own efforts. This does not mean that you should do everything by your own (after all, magical things can happen if people join forces), but it simply means that pure fulfillment is not achieved when someone else does all of the work and you simply sit back and wait until 'the good things' happen. Do not get me wrong: this approach does have the potential to cause happy feelings. However, we are talking inner fulfillment, which is way beyond that.

Now we have the meaning of inner fulfilment clear, we can continue with the factors that I referred to in the beginning. What does positively contribute to a feeling of inner fulfillment and - evenly, if not more, important - what does not? The first example that comes to my mind is money. Money is highly misunderstood, if you ask me. It does not have some sort of magical inherent characteristic that it brings inner fulfillment, despite of what some people might think. To be more specific, success (whether it is in the form of money or something else) based on anything but inner fulfillment is doomed to be empty. Instead of striving for money, I therefore recommend you to strive for something else: doing what you love. This might seem a trivial advice, but it can be tricky to apply it in practice. Roughly speaking, doing what you love requires that 1) you know yourself, 2) you are honest with yourself, and 3) you find a way to go after the things you love. First, you need to find out what you like doing most without thinking of all kind of circumstances that could prevent this from happening. It is essential that you are completely honest with yourself during this process, so keep challenging yourself: am I fooling myself? Is this what I really want to do, or is it something people expect from me? Do I want this myself, or am I trying to live conform common thinking? The urge to conform to others' expectations or common thinking could even be unconsciously, so it is a good thing not to rush when it comes to finding out what you love doing. Keeping a journal, writing all of your ideas in a notebook, or practicing meditation might be valuable tools!

Then, after you decided what you love doing, you need to find a way to make it happen. There may be many barriers that are resistant to you and your plans, but remember that you need to choose you in your strive for inner fulfillment. Even if the barrier is someone you truly love, remember that you cannot completely give your heart and soul to someone else if you do not give it to yourself first.

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